Midget Michael Jackson Impersonator

Whenever someone asks me why I love Manhattan as much as I do, I may begin telling this story.

Out and about on a sunny Saturday, I passed through the Times Square station to change trains. I heard something in the distance. A familiar refrain. Is that "Smooth Criminal?" Damn right it was. There was also cheering. Better investigate.

Coming around the corner in the dank subway station I froze in my tracks. Is that what I think it is? By Odin's beard ... It is. That's a midget Michael Jackson impersonator shaking his tail feather. The crowd was loving it. Little MJ grabbed his little ballsack and everything.

The song ended and then I heard something that made this even more surreal. A local mother wanted to capture the moment in pictures. She directed her son to approach the performer. The child's name was amazing. "Messiah! Go stand next to midget Michael Jackson so I can get a picture!"

That's a sentence I never thought I'd hear.

Good luck topping that weekend sight, Planet Earth.

Freaking love New York...