Monday, July 21, 2008

A Few New York Oddities


One of the many reasons that I love the town so nice they named it twice is you never know what you'll see each day. It literally could be anything. That and the hot dogs.

Recently my boy Adam witnessed a horrible and hilarious subway-poop debacle. His detailed recount of the tale can be read here. If you dare...

That story topped when I was walking to the Ed Sullivan Theater to go to work a few years ago. It was about 8:45 in the AM. I was walking through Central Park. Had just passed the group of Chinese octogenarians doing synchronized Tai Chi. I rounded the corner and was walking by Sheep Meadow, a huge piece of grass. There I saw a lone person in the middle of that vast lawn. I did a double-take. Is he doing what I think he's doing?!? Yep, in the exact middle of Sheep Meadow, there was a hobo making a deuce. The exact middle. The bloody epicenter. There are millions of shrubs, bushes and trees to hide behind. Why this gentleman picked the center of the Meadow to have a moment, I'll never know.

Anyhoo, there were three sightings last week that made me chuckle.

1. On the way to Mama's Pizzeria for, uh, breakfast, I saw a young man that had sagged his jeans below his rear end. That is not odd, that's commonplace. But, this guy took the practice to the next level. He had TWO pairs of boxer shorts on, and had sagged them incrementally. He had a three layer sag. Red undies, white undies, jeans. Amazing.

2. Near 48th Street, where I was going to play guitar at Manny's Music one evening, there was a hobo asking the passersby, "Spare some change so I can get somethin' the eat? Spare some change so I can get somethin' the eat? Spare some change so I can get somethin' the eat?" Now, this is not unusual, that is a common phrase used by beggars. This cat was on a cell phone while he was asking. He wasn't doing very well.

3. On Broadway and 103rd was a seemingly normal gentleman running his errands. But, he had a cat on his head. Seriously. A black cat, tethered by a leash, was sitting on the man's coconut. Well done, sir. Never seen that one.

New York City is a miracle.

Good night and good luck...

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